By now we all know that if you want to be a lover of the Spice Girls, you have got to get with their friends. We get it. But after all these years, I am still unsure of what Scary, Baby, Ginger, Posh and Sporty meant by their other famous phrase: I wanna really, really, really wanna zigazigah.
There was speculation about the meaning when a co-writer of Wannabe revealed earlier this summer that 'zigazigah' was a take on the words 'shit' and 'cigars.' That's clever enough, but eh. I'm not buying it.
Unable to wonder no more, I decided to do my own research. I would go back and relive my Spice Girls days. I would listen closely to Wannabe, as well as the other Spice Girls hits, even the B sides. Yes, they had B sides. I'd go through all the fan books I saved, the stories, their image, their Chupa Chup lollipops:
I would solve this mystery! So, after many hours smiling and dancing and positivity, I've narrowed it down to 10 other possibilities as to what our 90's pop queenz meant by 'Zigazigah.'
1 . ORGASM - This is, of course, the obvious answer. We know the Girls were indeed having sex thanks to the lyrics of 2 Become 1. BUT. What we don't know is, WERE THEY CUMMING? Answer: Probably not. Which brings me to...
2. THE CHANCE TO WORK WITH ALAN CUMMING - Alan Cumming, another famous UK-er, was #1 on Broadway for his role as the Emcee in Cabaret. He wore his knickers on stage and loved singing about sex so of course the girls wanted to work with him! And they did. In Spice World. Although, I'm pretty sure this is the closest they ever appeared together throughout the 'film.' Film is in parentheses because, well, it's Spice World.
3. BABIES! - The girls were roughly between the ages of 20-25 when Wannabe was released but, man, their wombs were already BURNING. They even got a whole song about mamas that I WILL cry to given the right road trip. Now, every Spice has their very own offspice. Nice work, ladies.
4. A BABY G WATCH - Speaking of babies, I looked through a lot of images from the 90's and these watches were everywhere. Everywhere except on the wrists of the Spice Girls. And, there's not one but two G's in zigazigah. Coincidence?
5. THE WORST REMIXES EVER - As a huge fan of the Spice Girls (and super cool tween), even though I already owned the albums, I would buy every dumb single that was released. In doing my research, I found some absolutely horrific remixes on these singles. Think dub step and bad tribal beats and techno on acid. Shame on you, Virgin Records.
6. A GOOD HALLOWEEN COSTUME - What if this all started by five friends trying to think of a good group costume for Halloween? "You be scary! And, and, I'll be a baby! And, Geri, make your twat as visible as possible! We'll get soooo much candy!"
7. DINNER - It's like how I would finish book reports in 3rd grade when I didn't finish reading the book: "You'll have to read Charlotte's Web for yourself to find out what happens to Wilbur and his spider friend which is very much alive at the point when I stopped reading!" I gave up! I was OVER IT. And given the intensity of Wannabe's lyrics and message, I'm sure after a stressful 30 minutes of brainstorming, the Spice Girls were also OVER IT and just wanted to eat some fish n chips with their hoes.
"Fuck it, write Zigazigah and let's GTFO."
8. NORMAL SHOES - Mel C always knew what was up.
9. A COKE COMMERCIAL - I know. Right now you're thinking, "Carolyn, the Gals were in a PEPSI commercial not Coke. What kind of fan are you?!" But check it. PEPSI can practically spell 'spice' except! There's no C. Where's the C guuuys? Oh, that's right. It's in the Coke! BOOM.
10. EQUAL RIGHTS - Good lord, the Spice Girls were crazy but they showed me I could be whoever the fuck I wanted to be and I wish certain people in charge would think the same. Come on DC, it's time to put on some obnoxious, chunky heels, pull your orange hair into old school raver buns, throw up a peace sign and give me some god damn inspiration.